I’ve decided that at the ripe, old age of 25 I am still too immature for public restrooms. I walked into one of the bathrooms at my job yesterday and it smelled really rude. This always freaks me out, and not for the obvious reason. I just worry that someone is going to walk in while I’m walking out and assume I made the smell happen. I know they're judging me.
I probably get this horrid fear of being judged from being incredibly curious and just a little judgmental myself. Mostly curious. Or, at least that's what I tell myself every night before bed.
There is this guy who stands on a cross street two blocks from where I work. Well, he doesn’t stand there- he dances there. Every day the sun is out, you’ll find him with his iPod, dancing on the corner to some music only he can hear. I’m 99% sure it’s hip hop, though, or else he’s found a very unique way to express himself to classical music.
There is no sign asking for money. There is no ready explanation. He just dances.
Guys, I need to know why.
I wonder every time I see him. I can’t imagine waking up one morning and thinking, “today is the day I dance on the corner.” It's hard not to admire it a little. And then I go right back to thinking he's crazy.
There is another woman I see every day on my drive, who I wonder about. She stands outside of a pawn shop with one of those “we buy gold,” signs. She wears it around her neck day in and day out, her head bent over a huge paperback book. I’m dying to know what she’s reading. Tolstoy or something with Fabio on the cover? The Bible? A self help book? I just want to know.
I also want to know who decided these “we buy gold” signs were a good idea in the first place. I wonder if they actually generate business. I’ve never seen one of those signs and thought, “oh you do? I happen to have gold to sell,” and stopped to sell that gold.
I don’t think I’ve ever seen any sign that made me stop immediately.
Then again, I’m lazy.
I blame my recently supercharged laziness on the rain. Yes, it’s still raining. We do get brief bouts of sunshine but they are unpredictable. And seeing as how I don’t own any rain appropriate footwear and mostly wear flip flops everywhere, the best way to avoid wet feet is to stay inside. Oh, did someone suggest buying rain appropriate foot wear? Well, no.
Apart from highlighting how curious and/or judgey I can be, work has also made me acutely aware of how terrible I am at accepting compliments. Actually, I don’t think I’ve ever met a person who has said, “me! I’m awesome at accepting compliments.” If you are that person, please speak up.
So yes, the good news is that my new boss is happy and is very lavish in her compliments. And there comes me, sputtering my “thank you, thank you” thing that I’ve recently adopted because...? Yes.
I sometimes think about how I should be reacting to this high praise.
I’ll keep working on it, obvs.
I’m very much looking forward to this long weekend. My plans include sleep, painting, shopping, office supplies, sleep, and lemon pepper wings.
I hope you all have amazing weekends. I really do adore you. You are the best at everything. You rock.