Can I talk to you a little about drool?
Sitting here with a broken printer and absolutely nothing to do for the next hour and a half, and wondering just where my spirits are, my head keeps taking me back to drool. Why?
1. Yesterday, I was sitting on the floor with a group of my gal-pals when my older cousin walked in the room. She was talking and giggling when suddenly she involuntarily drooled. We all got a weird view of it, as she was towering above us. Everyone sort of stopped laughing and didn't know what to do. She made it better with, "I was gonna swallow..." Heh. Don't you hate it when that happens? Anyone?
2. One of the scenes in a long dream I had last night was me, waking having drooled all over my pillow. I woke up and promptly picked up my phone, loaded the Facebook app and status-ed: I drooled all over my pillow! Sexaaay. (That's how I spelled it in the dream.)
3. So says Penny in our email conversation this morning:
P: Your comment about Precious made me spit water, literally. Ahahaha.
L: Yay water spit! That's always attractive.
P: Totes not attractive, but whatev’z. Who wants to attract people anyway? That just leads to dating and dating just leads to sadness. The whole process is no bueno. I’ll walk around all of CBA dribbling water if it means I don’t have to deal with that anymore.
Drool. It's your letter of the day.
Read the rest of my weekend-cap fully understanding that it's 4:30pm on a Monday at work with no cookies in sight. Otherwise, I've been dandy. At this moment, it's hard to really gather up happy sorts of emotions. And here we go:
Friday, I called out (texted out?) of work. Rox and I had errands to run. We ate breakfast at Einstein's, I picked up my contacts from the eye doctor's office and then we were off to LabCorp so Rox could do a pee-test for her new job. (Yep! Yay Roxy. I didn't say anything sooner because SHE SHOULD TOTALLY TELL YOU HERSELF. Grumble.)
Oh my was that ever uncomfortable. The entire waiting area was packed with questionable characters. It smelled like a giant pee test in the room and on top of that, every few minutes, you got to here a new entitled witch spout off about wait times and "what's the point of appointments." Rox and I were clutching our purses. We weren't entirely sure why but that seemed like the absolute best thing to do.
After Rox peed, we headed off to the mall where we spent the remainder of the day. We did lots of looking and lots of trying on but not too much damage. I bought short skirts, which Rox couldn't buy cause she's got height. Rox bought work pants, which I could buy cause I've got none. We dinnered on Asian food and attempted to eat it with chop sticks. Rox was much better at it than I was. I like to shovel my food in my mouth, you know. It's more effective that way.
During the course of the day, I mentioned something about how Phoenix would probably enjoy the comedy show we'd be attending. Rox encouraged me to invite him, and despite knowing that Penny would have mixed feelings on that and not knowing how nicely Flava Puff and Phoenix would play together, we went for it. We giggled about keeping it a surprise from our dearest Pen. Rox also took the opportunity to call "shotgun" about 5 hours in advance, so we giggled some more about making all 6 feet and 4(?)inches of Phoenix sit in the back of my Scion equivalent of a clown car (TM Rox.)
After completely underestimating how much time we would need/have to get ready, I dropped Rox off and went home to decide that I had nothing to wear. Between emptying the contents of my closet onto the bed (because apparently, that helps the decision making process) and texts from EVERYBODY asking just how late I was going to be, because they all knew I wouldn't make it on time, and yadda, yadda, it was a wonder that I, Lorraine Valverde, was done on time. *Weeeeee.
Anyways, I left my house, got Rox, picked up Flava Puff and then Penny. As we stopped for gas, Rox and let Penny in on the Phoenix invite. *giggle.
Penny didn't freak. She was very willing to play nice as long as Phoenix did the same. Their entire beef comes from a few unfortunate Facebook threads, where (old)Phoenix was crotchety and mean.
(New)Phoenix, however, played nice(r). Since quiting smoking and drinking, going back to school and losing 35 pounds (none of which he let us forget) he's generally a more agreeable sort of fellow. Oh, he's still Phoenix. He loudly suggested at the improv show that something you do once in a lifetime is "smoke opium." He told Roxy, as he tried to push her out of the way so she wouldn't get the front seat, that she was badly put together and that he meant that as a compliment. He said he liked my "Morgan Freeman freckles." When I made a comment about never using a training bra, he called my boobs untamed and said they piss everywhere but on the paper, which hooray me! We giggled tons, obviously.
The show itself was good. Not as good as last year's show, and not as good as some of the other improv shows we've seen from them. The local team was actually much better than they were, this time around, but E and his team won the duel. Toper wasn't in attendance and neither were 2 other of the regular cast members we had the pleasure of meeting in Gville.
Oh, also, I mentioned that I was the driver and the show was somewhere in Miami. LOL at my friends for letting me drive. They were all pissing their pants and Rox, Pen and Flava were like rolling around in the back seat while Phoenix was grabbing his pasty knees for dear life. They were totes safe though! Geesh.
Saturday, I skipped out on the girly breakfast in favor of getting my car *drumroll please* an oil change! Yay me! Afterwards, Vyelit and I went more shopping at a different mall. I don't feel any skinnier, people, but everything I tried on in my normal size did not fit. I'm down a size and I don't know what I did to deserve it. Yay me again! Pass a cookie someone.
Also? I saw Magpie at the mall. Jeez. Er, um... Ugh. Moving on.
Vye and I's real mission was to buy a gift for a wedding shower we were heading to that evening, again in Miami. And again, I drove my mom and my sisters there. LOL family. Silly people.
Let me tell you that I have no tolerance for baby showers/wedding showers/birthday parties/etc. Here's why that was probably a lovely event, but I was itchy every second of it:
1. How many Hispanic, chattering women can you fit into one Miami house with the AC off and the windows open? A-freakin'-lot, that's how many. It was so hot. And not the fun-sun-shinning-outdoor-activity type of hot, which I can deal with, but the hey-haven't-you-ever-heard-of-personal-space type of hot.
2. I've known both the bride and groom to be for a long time now, through church. I mean, I love them both but it's always a little strange to be at these types of events with people you grew up with.
3. Wedding showers to the vast majority of people that attend, as I have come to find in my experience, are one giant excuse for sexual innuendo. Holy fudge I can't communicate how much I do not want to hear MY MOM joking about her honey moon night or every woman in my entire church talking about how eager they were or... EWW.
4. The awkward nudges my way saying that I'll get to that wedding night and know all about what they're talking about, ha ha ha.
Yipes. She was beaming and happy, though, as I'm sure any gal would be.
I almost had plans with Pen and Rox for later that night, but Rox cancelled on account of sleepies. And I spoke with Pen for a little but we both meh'ed plans into oblivion. I spent most of the night in bed before Ting Ting called me bored out of her mind. I drove to her house, we went to Publix and bought cartons of ice cream (marry me Ben & Jerry's Phish Food ice cream!) and we ate straight out of the carton as we sat outside of her house on top of my car. It was nice to talk to her about my recent "Being A Good Girl Initiative." She laughed at me. -_-
Sunday, I had church of course, and later on Venus and Fetus came over and we had snacks and I made them watch Iron Man. I was convinced Venus would love it, because she's an action movie type-gal, but Iron Man was totally a theater movie. I remembered loving it when I originally saw it, but I rather meh about it the second time around, and Venus agreed. Meh.
And so, here I am today, back at work. I've decided to stop calling my temp job a temp job. They haven't hired me but when I walked in my cube today, I had boxes of files to scan and a second flat screen moniter set up for me. I was confused as I've heard a few of the accountants begging for a second screen. When my boss walked in she explained that she gave me a new screen because I'll need it for an upcoming project. Upcoming when? Oh, they don't really know. Future-ish. It's only thought of at this point. Way to keep me around temp!job. No complaints. The economy, and all.
These screens are bigger than I am.
All else is well enough, my dears. I'll say no more, less my Monday funk give you the wrong impression. All is well.
Kisses!
Lorraine
